My Conversation With A Broken Woman

My interaction with my Mother this morning was bittersweet. On the one hand, we made definite progress toward healing our relationship and ensuring that she continues to spend time with her grandson. On the other, I found out she’s broken.

Lost somewhere between wanting to be a good, subservient woman and wanting to live a blissful life in passivity, she claims that she truly has no concept of her own self-worth or the power she exerts over me and my son.

This woman has consistently laid her life down in the mud so that others can trample over her, disrespect her and take advantage of her. Because her uncles and brothers were often drunk, violent and verbally cruel. Because those same “men” treated her mother the same way. Because it’s just always been this way.

Although we do not live with my Uncles or see them often, my son is learning to be just like them. He’s learning that her word – or mine, as she often objects to my rules and discipline – aren’t worth anything. I’m sorry but no matter how wonderful I think my son is, an 8 year old does not have the capacity or the right to run a household!

There is much more to this story than I’m telling here but I know there are many, many broken women (and men) out there who need to understand something.

If even the lowest beggar, with tattered clothing and a stench that would knock down a buffalo deserves our respect simply because he or she was created by our own Creator, why aren’t YOU worthy of that same respect?

If you would go out of your way to help someone in need, why won’t you help yourself?

Because you don’t deserve it? Well honestly, who does?! Who on the Lord’s Green Earth is perfect enough to “deserve” anything? Do they have to have kids, not enough income, a broken arm, a run down house?

Your body is your spirit’s house and your spirit is broken! How’s your body? Is it run down or damaged? I’d say you qualify for help.

We are all sinners. We all mess up in spite of trying so hard to be perfect. We all wish we were better people.

The next time you decide – yes, I said decide – to bend over and let someone walk all over you, think about that beggar. Most of us would rush up to help or somehow defend a beggar who was being beaten. Why should we allow ourselves to be treated that way?

DISCLAIMER: I publicly acknowledge that I’m guilty of this too. I know just how hard it is to overcome the abuse mentality, to break away from all of the habits and traits we’ve learned and come to accept as normal when things are anything but.

Bless your family by empowering yourself!


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